the cost of care

August 11th, 2010

Does child care cost more than college?

People are often surprised that we both work and have no nanny. We didn’t plan on it but at this point, 12 months into this parenting thing, we’re still rolling with it and figuring out what works and how long we can pull it off.

Before Asher was born I planned on taking about a year off. My job is hard. Its time consuming and stressful and I almost always have to travel. I worked my butt off for years to save enough money to not work for a year. Because of that I was one of the lucky few that didn’t worry about day care placement or nanny interviews during pregnancy or when I had a tiny infant. When a 6 week job offer came up last December I took it because I didn’t feel like I could turn it down, even though it wasn’t part of the plan.  We decided to look for a nanny then realized Matthew didn’t have work for much of January and decided to wait it out. It was only supposed to be 6 weeks.

I started working full time after the new year. Matthew was home with Asher and we had a few babysitters to call when Matthew worked outside the house.

We had a few bad days, as expected. My second day at work Matthew had a stomach virus and I had to go. We had no sitter yet so he had to take care of a 6month old between barfs. One time our sitter called in sick and I had to stay home, on just about the worst day possible – the day before a week long event in Barcelona. Luckily I had a very understanding team and really supportive coworkers. Matthew started working more and more, but timing on his jobs is often flexible and his outside work was not steady enough to hire a full time caregiver. I was still nursing, He just began to eat solids. I had my hand in everything from his nap schedule and daily activities to when and what he was eating. Without a full time nanny and the trust that comes with it, I had a lot of extra to-do’s while still working 60+hrs a week. To add to it I insisted on making all of his baby food when I got home at night. The entire experience was not without stress.

That first project ended up being 2 projects and went all the way through March. When it was over I had no other jobs planned. I decided that I wouldn’t look for work but if it found me I wouldn’t turn it down. I got a call mid-april to work part time for the month of May – from home- and jumped at the chance. I liked working and I worked at home for years so I really prefer it. On days Matthew was busy I got a part time sitter and it worked out perfectly. Some days I got to take Asher to music class in the morning, and then work all afternoon. Other days I had no deadlines so we’d go to the park or a playdate and I managed  to fit everything in during his naps and into the evening. It was hard. We got used to it. Matthew and I talked about part time day care in the fall or winter. It could be good for him, good for us. But I had no project booked and neither did Matthew and it seemed silly to put him in day care 2 days a week when I was sitting at home.

I started working again part time in July and this week I start full time through the middle of September. I interviewed 3 babysitters who each have flexible schedules and have been having them cover Matthew’s work days the past 2 weeks. They are all amazing – grad students and recent graduates who have fallen in love with Asher already.

We are talking again about a part time nanny who could do flexible hours or maybe even enrolling him 2 days a week in day care come January but we’re finding it hard to commit to the cost. Since we are both freelance its almost impossible to estimate if we have extra money in the budget each month, especially for something that is so significant. We are talking $1,000 a month for 2 days a week of care. Days one or both of us might be home for weeks at stretch.

At this point the current plan is for him to start pre-school when he turns 2 next fall – 2 or 3 mornings a week. In the meantime we do the juggle. We only get paid on the days we work and we have not yet turned anything down because of Asher. With no family around, and few other resources we make it work between the 2 of us, flexible schedules, amazing friends and co-workers and a couple of really alternative career choices. To me, its worth the $12,000 –  $28,000 a year we’d spend on part to full time care. Yes, employing a full time nanny costs more than my rent (read the article in the times I linked to at the top of the post). Yes, I am making about 1/2 to 2/3 as much as I did in the years prior to having Asher but since the economy is still sluggish I can’t guarantee that I can get more work this year or next.

Plus the more time I get with my boy the better. I happen to enjoy his goofy music class as much as he does.

Entry Filed under: My little nugget,Whatever